I wanted to blog about this because what it means to me is not really what the world or the church thinks. I have a brother that is Wiccan, I used to be too. We talk freely with each other without hatered or predgidice, we talk respectfully and honoring of each other’s wishes and beliefs.
We were both raised “christian” but the kind we were raise is the cold, uncaring, unloving, distant kind that most everyone hears about and knows. I wasn’t allowed to read or question the bible, I was to except it as truth and deal! As a teen I went away from the church and God. I didn’t want to be a part of anything that was so cruel and mean.
Time went on, life happened and Jesus found me in a very dark place. My soul was struggling to hang on. I was reaching out for something, anything! Hope and Faith slowly crept back into my life through the eyes of my children.
I went to church off and on with my boys. However as I submersed myself into the folds of these “christians” who of some are very good people I couldn’t help but know that this was just not me. I am not a church goer. I could see myself slowly turning into one of these people that’s classified as “them”. That’s just not me! I’m not a “them” person. I love so many things that “they” don’t and I don’t see anything wrong with it. I was pretending to be someone else so I could be a “them” person and it was slowly taking me down again.
I quit going to church and then the phone calls started. “we miss you”, “what’s happened?” “did someone say something?” “are you all ill?”. The thing is in every other situation that I had rehearsed in my mind just what to say too. “yes, we’ll be back soon”, “oh just dealing with some sickness”, and so on and so on. One day though our pastor’s mom called, see she runs the ladies prayer meeting. In asking all the same questions and as I was ready for my made up come back I paused and replied with the truth.
I don’t want to go anymore. My boys don’t want to go. I was forced to go as a child, wether I had a fever or was throwing up. I was raised that if you went against the church was to go against God. That if I didn’t go to church I’d go to hell. I won’t raise my boys like that. God is love, Jesus is kind, the Holy Spirit will fill you up if you ONLY just believe! Church is just a building, it is us that are the temple of the Lord.
She ended the call shortly after with a final plea of “please come back soon”. Will I? I don’t know. I’m a much better christian not going to church than I am when I go. I know right? I’m as taken back as most that will read this but let me get a better foundation for you of what a true christian is to be as I’ve read it for myself in the Gosples of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John in the bible.
First I believe the bible is truth, I believe that Jesus is God’s son that was sent for our sins, that He died, was resurrectied and is in heaven now. As I read the Jesus stories for myself I realized that most of what gets preached is wrong. I could post a million and one verses but you will skeem over it or scoff it off. I’m just gonna say get a bible or go to http://www.biblegateway.com/ and look it all up for yourself. The thing is you have to first put away the old way of thinking, of what’s been drilled in your head.
What I found is that Jesus excepted EVERYONE, He NEVER judged anyone. Jesus hung out with the ones that didn't go to church, the ones that were shunned by the church. Jesus was the original outlaw! He preached blessings of love and acceptance, peace and understanding. To be a christian is to be "christ" like. Jesus is the Christ so to be like Jesus is to be loving, understanding, compassionate and unjudging. So my brother when I turned my life back to Christ was worried. Would I turn into a "them" person and he would lose his sister forever? Honestly I was going down that road. While in church I quit reading my bible, I quit praying as much. I didn't think really that I "needed" that one on one with Jesus anymore because I was in church now. Thing is I need Jesus and that one on one like I need water to survive! With all my anxiety and depression clinging to the cross and the hope of Jesus works better for me than any man made drug my doc could give me.
I talked to my brother just yesterday and he was glad we were gonna be okay. He was shocked too when I not only supported his religious views but also made it clear I support his gay lifestyle and the right for them to marry. I even showed my support publicly on my FB person page. I lost some "friends" on that one, but ya know what so did Jesus.
He drew a line in the sand and in front of a known prostitute said "he who is without sin, cast the first stone". Jesus came to save us, not judge us. God has rules, okay so you follow them or don't but that's between you and God NO ONE ELSE!
To me being a christian is accepting and loving everyone for who they are and what they believe. Jesus saved me in more ways than one and not spreading His truth is just something I can’t keep from doing.